After nearly a year, every pregnancy and birth announcement on Facebook feels like a punch in the gut. And I get the need to post those happy updates, really. I felt the same way about engagement and wedding posts once upon a time, and when my time came, I posted anyway. But they can still be difficult reminders of what's not happening for you, and not in the same way that posts about promotions and awards are. After all, those things are about hard work. There is some measure of control. Getting married and having babies is about luck. Know how I found a husband? I got lucky. Know how babies get made? Ask Google or your parents. I'm keeping it PG-13 here. But seriously, even if you do everything right, you still don't have control. For me, this is yet another reminder of the fact that my body doesn't really do anything well. It's a dumb body. We have issues. So basically, I can't handle the daily pregnancy and birth announcements. Not right now. And I'm not exaggerating when I say daily, people. And it's not like I can just unfollow people-these announcements are always kind of a surprise, you know? I don't have cameras in peoples' houses.
To be clear, people who are posting these things: I have no expectation that you will censor your posts based on how they might make other people feel. That's ridiculous. But, I also can't 100% control my emotional reaction to your posts. And, as I'd rather be happy for you than resent you, I'm controlling what I can and limiting my exposure to what's bothering me. Seems fair enough.
As for us, it's completely weird that I posted about trying to have kids. But, like I said, maybe people need to talk about it more. And by "talk about it", I don't mean give us your fertility advice. We haven't been told we're hopelessly infertile or anything; as a matter of fact, we haven't been told anything except "well, sometimes it takes a year, come back when it's been a year." But that still doesn't mean I can handle any more pinterest-inspired pregnancy photo shoots on my newsfeed. Nothing personal, guys. Post away. And I will enjoy my Facebook-free life for awhile.